Complicated Shoes

"I like to be kissed when someone is doing sex to me."

Sat, 21 Nov 2009 23:38:30 -0500

“I like to be kissed when someone is doing sex to me.”

- Hu Jintao to Barack Obama

"I love the Heimlich! I’m always doing the Heimlich! It’s one of my favorite maneuvers!"

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 15:20:49 -0500

“I love the Heimlich! I’m always doing the Heimlich! It’s one of my favorite maneuvers!”

- Dr. Paul Kirkwood

In reference to a photo shoot of a client's new office building...

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 13:15:09 -0500

clientsfromhell:

Client: We love our new building and we thought it would be great to have pictures of it in all four seasons from the exact same angle.

Photographer: That sounds like a really cool project.

Client: Great! So what are the chances having those ready for our convention next month?

Whenever I hear Bruce Springsteen’s Born to Run, I think...

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 10:30:48 -0500

Whenever I hear Bruce Springsteen’s Born to Run, I think about how funny it would be if we found out that Bruce runs like an idiot… Arms flailing all over the place. I think it would change the song for a lot of people if that were to be the case.

goldenrat1o: 1) Democrats claim health bill “Saves Medicare”2) Democrats decide to remove $400...

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 09:08:54 -0500

goldenrat1o:

1) Democrats claim health bill “Saves Medicare”
2) Democrats decide to remove $400 Billion from Medicare in health bill

Sorry, this doesn’t make any fucking sense.

It makes sense when you factor in the fact that ObamaCare will essentially put all the old people out to pasture, making Medicare obsolete.

“I Belong” - Kathryn Scott

Thu, 19 Nov 2009 11:31:41 -0500

“I Belong” - Kathryn Scott

thedailyfiona: kasumi-gakure: Graham exposes Holder’s, and the...

Wed, 18 Nov 2009 23:12:00 -0500

thedailyfiona:

kasumi-gakure:

Graham exposes Holder’s, and the Obama administration’s, buffoonery. The circus begins:

SENATOR LINDSEY GRAHAM, (R-S.C): Can you give me a case in United States history where a enemy combatant caught on a battlefield was tried in civilian court?

ERIC HOLDER, ATTORNEY GENERAL: I don’t know. I’d have to look at that. I think that, you know, the determination I’ve made —

GRAHAM: We’re making history here, Mr. Attorney General. I’ll answer it for you. The answer is no.

Every voting American should be required to watch this. Here we have the Attorney General of the United States… The man whose only job it is to enforce federal laws… demonstrating that he is unfamiliar with Constitutional law and showing the world that he and this administration are oblivious to the consequences of their actions in regards to trying terrorists in the federal court system.

Our country is now being run by people that wish it harm. There is no other explaination. If Barack Obama did not want to see America weakened, he would not allow this trial to happen and Eric Holder would be immediately fired. That will not happen because Barack Obama is fine with America being weak.

UPDATE: More evidence that Eric Holder is on the side of the enemy. Yes, the attorney general has actually defended terrorists. This administration hates America.

"Palin is a phenomenon, and honest liberals would be well-advised to read her work and understand her..."

Wed, 18 Nov 2009 17:12:50 -0500

“Palin is a phenomenon, and honest liberals would be well-advised to read her work and understand her appeal, just as conservatives should read “Dreams From My Father” to understand the mind of Bill Ayers.”

- The Greenroom » Forum Archive » How Do You Solve This Problem Without Sarah?

Read the whole thing.

Obama admits Guantanamo lie.

Wed, 18 Nov 2009 11:48:41 -0500

Obama admits Guantanamo lie.:

thedailyfiona:

muppetpants:

President Obama directly acknowledged for the first time Wednesday that the prison facility at Guantanamo Bay will not close by the January deadline he set, but he said he hoped to still achieve that goal sometime next year.

Obama refused, however, to set a new deadline.

I certainly don’t give a fuck, but where’s the outrage from the left…?

They’re all too busy looking for Sarah Palin’s birth certificate.

Recovery Board Chairman: We Can’t Certify Jobs Data at Recovery.gov

Wed, 18 Nov 2009 11:37:36 -0500

Recovery Board Chairman: We Can’t Certify Jobs Data at Recovery.gov:

randyhaddock:

The chairman of the Obama administration’s Recovery Board is telling lawmakers that he can’t certify jobs data posted at the Recovery.gov Web site — and doesn’t have access to a “master list” of stimulus recipients that have neglected to report data.

[…]

The letter comes amid mounting criticism of stimulus figures that have been riddled with errors, undercutting the administration’s claims that stimulus dollars have helped “save or create” 1 million jobs.

ABC News has reported in recent days that Recovery.gov lists scores of jobs and millions of dollars in spending in congressional districts that do not exist.

Separately, the administration has slashed more than 60,000 jobs from its most recent report on the program, because the reporting outlets submitted “unrealistic data.”

Is there anyone on the left that will even attempt to argue that this administration is transparent? They have no shame.

hilker: who says you can’t buy votes with other people’s...

Tue, 17 Nov 2009 11:11:00 -0500

hilker:

who says you can’t buy votes with other people’s money?

a friend sent this to me last night & i just had to post it. sometimes i’ll listen to shanin & parks on my way home & they play this clip when ever someone like this calls in. the way she says “obama money” cracks me up every time. and it almost saddens me that she has no idea where this money is coming from. [this could take us down an interesting rabbit hole: politicians & citizens using each other etc. we won’t go there.]

and i’m not saying republicans haven’t bought votes with tax cuts & whatnot, but as democrats are fond of saying, affected wealth is in the hands of very few people.

Hooray for public schools for churning out geniuses like this.

Russia's Medvedev warns about global warming

Mon, 16 Nov 2009 16:54:48 -0500

Russia's Medvedev warns about global warming:

Okay, this should be a red flag, right? (no pun intended)

I mean Russia has winter like 14 months a year. Wouldn’t global warming be a welcome change there?

I’m just sayin, if the guys in the furry hats are worried its going to get too warm, perhaps they aren’t interested in the climate as much as they are in telling you what you can and can’t do.

Just a thought.

Ken Ober, ‘Remote Control’ Host, Is Dead

Mon, 16 Nov 2009 16:39:21 -0500

Ken Ober, ‘Remote Control’ Host, Is Dead:

You have to figure that the odds of Ken Ober going before Colin Quinn had to be somewhere close to 500-1, right?

At least Obama doesn’t kneel.

Mon, 16 Nov 2009 14:50:36 -0500

At least Obama doesn’t kneel.

"Most people with serious opinions can handle it and defend them when someone says ‘oh really’."

Sun, 15 Nov 2009 23:44:20 -0500

“Most people with serious opinions can handle it and defend them when someone says ‘oh really’.”

- catbus

“Serious” being the key word here. The truth is, complicatedshoes, like so many of the right wing demagogues he’s previously defended, isn’t serious. Not about bowing to a foreign dignitary—where social custom and basic civility dictate bowing, not about terrorists receiving a fair trial—even if it is in keeping with every national and international law and ideal that America has ever claimed to believe in. He is a true testament to the very idiocy of the right that he claims doesn’t exist.

Brainless. Feckless. Ridiculous.

(via robot-heart-politics)

giggles. i heart you too.

Protip: Picking on Liberals raises your Tumblarity

Sun, 15 Nov 2009 22:03:46 -0500

(…and makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.)

"How did a man that does not understand what it means to be an American get elected President of the..."

Sun, 15 Nov 2009 21:57:24 -0500

“How did a man that does not understand what it means to be an American get elected President of the United States?”

- Complicated Shoes

Dear Complicated Shoes:

Since you seem to be an authority on the matter, what exactly does it mean to be an American? Enlighten me.

(via squashed)

holy fuck, was this serious

(via catbus)

I’m pretty sure it was serious. Also, I managed to avoid listing all the things it means to be an American like holding people indefinitely without trial.

(via squashedcomments)

I’m reblogging this just as an example of why I usually don’t bother engaging the left. I post what I want and if it upsets them, I could really care less. He could have chosen any number of things to be his only example of what it means to be an American and this America-hating tool picked the indefinite detainment of known terrorists.

Fret not, precious. Your beloved terrorists are going to get their fancy trial and I’m sure they’ll be treated fairly by a jury of New Yorkers that haven’t forgotten.

It seems I've hit a nerve with the libbies.

Sun, 15 Nov 2009 21:10:18 -0500

Apparently my image post of Obama bowing to the Emperor of Japan with the caption about how he doesn’t understand what it meant to be an American has sent the Obamaniacs into a tizzy.

Some have asked what I think it means to be an American (should I point out the irony of them having to ask?).

But here goes…

The United States of America was founded after a revolt from the king of England. Americans don’t do kings. We don’t do queens. Royalty means nothing to us. Royalty is un-American. We’re not impressed by your bloodline.

Bowing out of deference to royalty is un-American. Bowing as a greeting could be acceptable but that is not what we saw in that image. The emperor did not bow back to the President. Obama bowed out of reverence of the emperor. We do not hold people to such esteem in this country. People are people. Maybe Obama would like it if people bowed to him. I’m sure there are even some people that live here that would do so. Those people don’t know what it means to be an American either.

But thanks for the traffic everyone. My tumblarity thanks you too.

How did a man that does not understand what it means to be an...

Sat, 14 Nov 2009 19:53:02 -0500

How did a man that does not understand what it means to be an American get elected President of the United States?

thatisracist: The African Anteater Ritual That is racist.

Sat, 14 Nov 2009 12:50:17 -0500

thatisracist:

The African Anteater Ritual

That is racist.