Complicated Shoes: Archive

Dec 29th

3 notes

Over the next three days, if anyone says to you...

Dec 29th

4 notes

That moment of panic when you're sitting in your...

…and then without skipping a beat, you immediately put another pretzel in your mouth.

Dec 29th

9 notes

Dec 29th

3 notes

Dec 28th

3 notes

Went to see War Horse today...

It was 45 minutes in before I realized we had accidentally gone in the wrong theater. But in case you were wondering, the first half of “I Don’t Know How She Does It” was pretty decent. Sarah Jessica Parker is pretty versatile.

Dec 25th

62 notes

Ask Me Stuff: Festivus Edition

Let’s do a Christmas-themed ASK COMPLICATED SHOES. Address me as the name of your favorite Christmas present you got as a kid. (Ex. “Dear Easy Bake Oven”) Ask me a question, drop me a comment, make fun of me. I don’t care. Sign yourself with your favorite Christmas movie. (Ex. “Love Always, Love Actually”) Ready? Go!

Dec 23rd

7 notes

"Space ball" drops on Namibia →

The comments on this story are hilarious.

Dec 23rd

1 note

Dec 21st

2 tags

Dec 21st

Dec 20th

1 note

Dec 20th

1,580 notes

Dec 19th

1 note

Dec 19th

241 notes

Merry Christmas →

(you’re welcome)

Dec 18th

1 note

Google "let it snow"

Can you call them easter eggs in December?

Dec 17th

Two churches located across the street from each...

tithenai: wizasaur: -prettyprettyplease: ultraball: paranoidrobot: …Do the Presbyterians think Rocks are animals? ALL ROCKS GO TO HEAVEN CONVERTING TO CATHOLICISM DOES NOT MAGICALLY GRANT YOUR DOG A SOUL. WOW. EPIC CATHOLIC WIN. I LOVE THIS.

Dec 16th

125,292 notes

“If the whole universe has no meaning, we should never have found out that it has...”

– C.S. Lewis

Dec 16th

3 notes

If I ever needed intravenous drugs, I would insist...

How’s that for a hypocritical hypoallergenic hypodermic hypothetical?

Dec 15th

Dec 14th

Apparently late night at the office for some...

not sure why anyone thinks anyone else wants to listen to their music.

Dec 14th

2 notes

Yours truly

I just heard someone use the expression “yours truly” in reference to someone else! He said, “just ask yours truly… Cathy over there.” Moron. Your bus is leaving.

Dec 14th

47 notes

Let's make the word "euphemism" a euphemism.

“Hey, I saw you left the bar with Rhonda last night. She has some really nice euphemisms. So did you euphemism her?” “Oh yeah. And we euphemismed 2 times last night and then in the morning we euphemismed again in the shower.” “Nice.” “She told me she has a friend that is single so if you’re looking for a little euphemism action of your own,...

Dec 14th

2 notes